Friday, October 10, 2014

It's hard to understand other people's relationships

I got a call recently from a friend who was totally ticked off.  She went out to dinner with her live-in boyfriend and friends of his from out of state.

During the entire meal, he kept tapping her with his foot under the table because he didn't like what she was talking about.

This is after he told her exactly what to wear and how to look for his friends.

She claims she will never go out in public with him again. And she still loves him.


How can you love someone that belittles who you are and thinks that you are not good enough for his friends?

Okay, maybe I understand loving him.  I don't understand staying with him.  She deserves better.

I have another, former, friend who quit her job for very justifiable reasons.  Her husband decided that if she could quit, so could he.  Um, he wasn't the one being tortured by a micro-manager.  She got another job within 5 months.

The last time I talked to her, he still wasn't working after 5 years.  This is why she's a former friend.  She was too embarrassed to talk to me any longer.

If she had been happy with the situation, I would have said, Whatever happens between you two is your business.  But she was miserable and talking about getting her reward in the afterlife.

She won't leave him because she loves him.

When did love become the excuse to accept whatever bad behavior people wanted to foist on us?

If our significant others actually loved us, wouldn't they treat us better?

Don't we all deserve to be treated better?


  1. So true! I think after the Twilight books came out, society's perception of a loving relationship took a major turn for the worst!

    1. Great analogy. That's a prime example of a dysfunctional relationship.

  2. Followed you over from Michelle's - your title was evocative to me! One of my oldest & dearest friends & I came to a parting of the ways in part bcz I couldn't STAND her 2nd husband... I really thought she'd "traded DOWN".
    Of course I gripe about mine, but that's MY prerogative isn't it?? ;-)

    1. Of course it's your prerogative! :-)
      It's sad though to lose a friend because they don't want to face us - or see themselves in us. After a while I stopped even asking about her husband, but it was the elephant in the room. Sigh.